Donnasblog

Today was one of those days where I was doing the old “fake it till’ you make it”.  It’s like I could burst into tears at any moment.  I am SO sick and tired of being sick and tired.  I am beat down from always being “on top of my game”.  I am EXHAUSTED!  WHEN DOES IT ALL END?!?!

Work is getting more stressful by the minute.  I have to work in a store that isn’t making any money, and bust my butt until it AT LEAST breaks even.  Trying to plan marketing strategies, get my stuff ready, and go is like the typical, “Hurry up and wait” game.  It’s gonna mean LONG hours and late nights, a lot of sacrifice on the company and my part, and a bigger pay check.    I want to impress everyone.  I say “Yes” before I even know what the question is.  It’s not that they are expecting miracles.  I am.  Hopefully it happens.

The girls got a hold of the sizzors last night, so after work I had to zoom to the daycare, pick up the girls, and get their hair cut.  Anyone with kids knows what a freaking JOY that is…..FOR TWO HOURS?!?!  Their hair wasn’t bad to begin with, so I  told the lady, “I don’t care what you do with it, but could you layer the choppy parts in?”  I thought that it would be a relatively simple task.  Nope.  She cut for an hour each, talking about how much “fun” it was to have “carte blanche”.  I was sitting there like, “Yea.  Great.  Get the hair cut, lady.  I’m hungry.”

SO, after that, I had to make the perilous trip to Mikey D’s because it was WAY past dinner time.  Yes, I was good and got a salad.  Yes, I tripped a little and got a small fry.  But, it was a SMALL fry.  And, it tasted damn good.

Then, I get home with the food, and there is a MOUNTAIN of laundary to do, plus the house looks like a earthquake shook everything out of place.  I wanted to cry when I walked through the door and REALLY looked around.  It has taken me until now to restore some semblance of order around here. 

So, at this VERY second, the girls are CLEAN and in bed, the mountain is becomming a mole hill, the house is SILENT, and I am so tired I could cry.  Suck thing is that tomorrow may not be EXACTLY like today, but damn similar.  

Some how, some way, I will find the strength to go downstairs to the workout room and do my 30 minutes.   I just want ONE DAY where I don’t feel like I am speeding through the day.  ONE DAY where there aren’t a million things to do.  ONE DAY where I can look at someone else and say, “You do it.”  ONE DAY where I can be weak, tired, and vaunerable.  Is that too much to ask?